Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Randomize
