i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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