How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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