yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Randomize
