Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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