I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Say something about gay babies.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
