You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
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