Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
