Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
so much tequila, so little girl.
Randomize
