did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
