the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
