Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
