your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
