I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
