I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
