he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize