I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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