You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
