Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
