If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
