Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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