I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
