Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Randomize
