I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
