I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
