she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
