Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
