Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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