I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize