We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
17 year olds will be the death of me.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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