even my farts smell like vagina
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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