I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I checked into jail on foursquare
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
