Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
