my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Randomize
