ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
