Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
