He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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