i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
