whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
