I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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