How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
