I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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