just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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