thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
