Jerry, you need to find god
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Randomize
