just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Randomize
