I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
