I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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