Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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