Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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